She used to be sad for some time that looked to her as if it was an eternity. She knew what she needed, and she knew when she would get it. Her sadness was due to incompleteness. She felt lacking of many things that, even though she knew how to get them, she didn't have the motivation to go after them. Those things were not even material things. Everybody knows that objects can light people up for a temporary amount of time, probably for just a few hours. What she needed was those things that cannot be touched, those things that we give them a name and we can recognize but that we cannot touch or grab. Those things were things like love, passion, excitement, belonging, happiness….
She felt that those things had to be searched somewhere far away, away from her real life. She knew that moment was coming closer and closer, and when she thought of that moment, she already could feel some of this excitement she was looking for.
When that moment arrived, she looked backwards and thought for a second about not making any other step forward, but this second couldn't make up her mind. She left knowing she was leaving behind some memories, places, and people that were in her heart, but after all, these things would remain with her, in her, wherever she was. And so she left. She was afraid. She was unsecure. She was nervous, she was lost. She loved having those feelings, feelings that smelled like adventure. Things that were so distant from the routine.
She set herself free. She wanted to feel like a wild animal. She started settling in her new home, where a new person would grow in her. She felt so different at the same time she was herself. She never felt so true. She wanted to smile, and that smile made other people smile. Making other people smile made her smile even more. Her eyes were shiny, full of joy. She felt so free even though she knew that wasn't completely true. Bus she felt so free... she woke up with will to live, and she just slept when her eyes couldn't hold it longer. She didn't want the days to end, but at the same time she felt curiosity for what the next day would be like. Everything was a mystery, a surprise, a gift.
She thought of how she could make this moment of her life to last forever. Because she knew that would end someday. But all she cared about now was the present. “Present is what we live. Past is made of memories and the Future is unknown. So why should I be worrying about that and tear my Present away? Don’t let neither the Past or the Future steal your Present. Go build your Present, the most amazing experiences you can dream of happen Now” she always said.
While knowing everything has an end, she would seize it as much as she could. Spontaneity was her favorite thing. How great could spontaneity be? She lend herself go wild and natural, with her body language saying "I am ready for everything". Although she knew that was temporary, she felt like it was going to last forever. She felt eternal and so she was eternal. She is eternal.
